Losing Your Job

Some generations (1960-1980) were raised with parents talking about finding a good company to work for. One where someone could retire and have health benefits until the day that they died. What I came to realize in 2000 was that companies were no longer looking for employees that wanted that kind of longevity.

If you found a state or county job you were set, but if you entered Corporate America, they could care less.  I guess when my mother retired from BellSouth, which was later bought out by AT&T and all that was promised to the Bellsouth retirees was thrown out of the window; I should have paid more attention.

It never occurred to me that companies would not want to retain workers that knew their business practices, their products and had relationships with their customers and vendors. To me that seemed like common sense. Well, I was wrong.

I left the medical field in 2000 because I was not making enough money to provide for my family.  I decided to enter the tech world at that time.  I was amazed at all the companies that told me “Well you will only be here for 5 years or so and then move on”.  I was like “What?” Why would that be?   That was the “norm” for tech companies from what I was told.  People would start the job, learn all they can, and move on to a new one to repeat the process. Once again, I should have paid attention.

When I interviewed for OSSI, I told them I wanted a job working with software that I like and could stake my reputation on. I wanted a place where I could retire from.  I did not like the idea of changing jobs every five years. Well as y’all know, they hired me. I felt they loved how much of myself I gave their products and business practices; because one of the owners told me so, every once in a while.  I thought they would have my back as much as I had theirs because I had worked hard as a non-military/law enforcement person to understand their world and did get a promotion within my first year! Three buyouts later, I quickly found out that was no longer the case. I found myself thrown under the “proverbial bus” being told to sign a “Performance improvement plan” on a performance that was not mine. Everything that was written up against me was not true; except the part where I was hard/mean to my newly hired trainees. (I mean our jobs did mean life or death to some of the people in the field, so in my opinion; you need tough.)

Prior to my HR/Team lead meeting on my previous year’s performance, I was training people. I had people with me onsite and with me whenever I had any customer interaction. Had they been asked about that performance review those people would have proudly said “No, that didn’t happen!” but of course, that was not the true issue. Well, I went home thought about it, and said “Nope”, “you have been looking for a way out. Do not sign it”.  I did not and that was history.

What I was not prepared for was the silence. People I thought were my friends outside of work seemed to no longer be interested in talking to me.  People I had helped, cared about, and encouraged during my 20-year tenure with that company were nowhere to be found. Now don’t get me wrong, some of you checked on me for a week or two; others, well we still talk but it is funny how one’s circle changes.  It was also funny; how my perspective changed.  I thought of those that left before me, some of their own accord, others due to layoffs and “firings”. I say “firings”, but let us be honest. NC is a state where you can be “fired” for not wearing a blue shirt on Tuesday. They do not really need a reason to tell you to hit the road.

Anyway, I never reached out to those people who left before me; not on my own.  They say hindsight is 20/20.  It never occurred to me to reach out.  I mean, what do you say?  Over the years, those that were gone due to a lay-off or were fired would call me up and we would schedule lunch. That wasn’t always the case, but when I put this group together, look how many of you I was easily able to invite to join. There are those that floated out of my life altogether and they say some people come into your life for a season. I guess their season had passed. But I will say it truly never occurred to me to do a weekly check-in on some of you. I apologize for that. I pride myself on being 100% honest and genuine. I feel like I let a lot of you down. I should have asked:  “How are you doing?,  Do you need anything?, Are you wanting to stay in this field or change into something new?, “How can I help ?”, Just want to let you know that I am keeping an eye out for any job openings that may help you.”  There are so many questions which could be asked to someone that loses a job. I was a lucky one. I had a customer that I was in the middle of implementing that begged me to start my own business as a consultant and help them finish their implementation. That business worked and was very successful until I sold it to my current employer due to covid.

Being let go from a job where that is your only income and how you pay your bills at any age is hard. However, when you are forty and over, well then you start to wonder if anyone will hire you due to your age.  It’s obvious to you that experience is not as important now as salary requirements. College kids don’t have high expectations so their salary requirements are much less than yours.  Should you have to take a pay cut because you lost what was thought to be a stable job?  I did. I took almost a 50% pay cut when I started at my current job. Do you know why? because he had only been in business for one year. However, we had the same ideas and business plan; and he was not corporate and never plans to be. Three years later I am 90% closer to making what I was with Corporate America for 20 years with 100% less stress. In my mind, that’s worth it.

Life gets scary when you are over forty and lose a job.  They say you find out who your friends are when something bad happens.  That is such a true story. I was amazed at how all the noise in my life stopped.  My mother told me I was the happiest she had ever seen me after I was let go. It was nice not to pretend anymore.  It was nice to not be on the road for work when she decided to get chemo. It was nice to be home when she passed away and not at a customer site. I genuinely believe everything happens for a reason.  I now work for a small non-corporate company where we are all 100% a team. Y’all know I find it hard to trust…it took me a bit to see that we really do help each other with every aspect of our jobs. I now get to focus on helping a department list out what they need in a software package to get their jobs done.  No corporate rules, and no vendor specifics, just work with the customer to ensure they get what they need out of the software they choose.  I love being able to help an agency figure out what is most important in their day-to-day tasks and how we can help to ensure that the task gets done efficiently and completely because it was an item that they listed as something they needed.

I want to let people know they should follow up with their former co-workers and friends when they lose a job. Many times, they get blind-sighted, and with today’s mental health being what it is…  Find out how they are doing, and do not let their world fall silent because they no longer have a 9-5. Ninety Percent of our interactions are with our co-workers and customers. I had a boss tell me once that my customers are not my friends, that if I was not doing this job these people would not speak to me.  I can tell you from experience that is NOT true.  I have former customers reach out to me monthly to check on me and find out what I am doing today. Many of my customers today are customers because of my tenure with OSSI. You leave a legacy everywhere you go even if it is for a brief period. Make sure that legacy is a good one.